Monday, November 8, 2021
My sincerest condolences to you Terry and the families at this time. Barb was always so bright and friendly, easy to talk to. She’ll be missed greatly by yourself, family and friends for sure. She certainly was a fighter and an inspiration to those suffering from all kinds of chronic diseases and health problems.
“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.” UNKNOWN AUTHOR
Terry, don’t let anyone tell you there’s a timeline for Grief and within xx number of days/months/years, you should be through with Grief. Everyone has their own way of dealing with it, and most at the beginning don’t even know how to start. True Best friends will stay with you throughout the years; other ‘friends’ will drift away because a) they don’t know what to say or act around you after a week or two (just being there is ok and helping with meals, remembering and letting you talk); b) the old adage of two’s company, three’s a crowd certainly came into play with Alan gone - I won’t go into the reasons or details here - playing cards with 3 or 5 is awkward, travel is difficult, etc; c) stay busy, keep in touch with good friends, social clubs you belong, stay active, most of all remember all those glorious good memories you shared; and, d) consider the hospice group for one of their group 8-week grief sessions if available.
This might not have been the place for all this but I have been thinking of the two of you often. Take care of yourself, stay safe, and may Barb rest in much deserved peace in His arms.
Bev J A Evanchu
